My Hijab, My Story

One Step Closer

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One Step Closer

There are questions that ultimately go through the mind of every Muslim girl and woman at one point or another in her life… “Should I wear the hijab or should I not? When should I wear it?” For me, it was a matter of knowing that by wearing the hijab, I would be a step closer to jannah. When I was battling with whether or not to wear the hijab, and at what point should I start, my older sister became an unexpected source of inspiration for me. I feel like I got lucky. I was about to start tenth grade in a completely new high school, and it was like Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala had given me an opportunity for a fresh start.

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Journey Back to Hijab

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Journey Back to Hijab

My hijab story is like a secret diary no one should ever read. It is filled with horrible facts about me and points to my mistakes and weaknesses. My journey to hijab is filled with fear, negativity and regret. So I warn you: read with caution. The most important thing you should know is that I used to wear hijab, but eventually took it off. I hate saying it, admitting to the world that I was one of those ignorant girls who went backwards after putting on the hijab, instead of moving forward with my deen. But it’s what I did and I can’t change that.

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Struggle Towards Light

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Struggle Towards Light

It was the year 2002, I was fourteen years old. After nearly eleven years in Europe, my family and I returned to our Muslim country – alhamdulilah. I wore t-shirts, tight jeans, hair hanging loose. I was athletic and played many sports. On the outside, I was a teenager; however, on the outside, I was merely a child. I studied in a mixed school, with Muslim boys and girls. I was the popular girl. Everyone knew me. To them, I was “cool.”

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She Made Me Smile

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She Made Me Smile

When told to picture women (everyday women, mind you, not nuns or priestesses) from other religions, I could find nothing to distinguish one from the other. I could simply imagine a woman clad in a white sun dress, hair flowing open, carelessly wandering the isles of a grocery store shopping for cantaloupes. If I walked past her, would I be able to tell if she was Christian or Jewish or even Buddhist for that matter? No. But if I walked past a Muslimah, I would know that she was one simply by her hijab.

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The Day of Blessings

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The Day of Blessings

I started thinking about the hijab after a big MSA event that took place at my high school, when this sheikh, Dr. Daoud Nassimi, gave me a personal talk about the advantages of hijab and why we have to wear it. After that day, I told myself that I would wear hijab after marriage. Then I started making sincere du’as, asking Allah ta’ala to guide me, and my plans kept changing and changing. So I changed my mind and decided to wear it after senior year, and then slowly, in Ramadan. I couldn’t stop thinking about it because I knew deep inside that I should wear the hijab.

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