Hijab is Tempting!

Guest writer Anonymous highlights that modesty, as an inner a part of our nature , will inevitably call out to us.

My road to Hijab began two years ago while I was still not a fully-practising Muslimah. I was not born into a practising Muslim family or country and therefore, I lacked knowledge. However, I started picking up the scattered pieces gradually and began to practise my deen. By that time, I could relate modesty as an integral part of Islam.

One of my friends who was on the same track as me echoed similar thoughts. Since we were still very new at practicing our faith, we decided to use our common sense to define modesty. So initially, although we used to wear the usual clothes, we used to cover our bosom extensively with extra layers of clothes. Soon, I started to discard clothes which were too revealing. I had always felt that a golden heart is what matters, so I did not have much of a problem in the process and did not care whether others found me “beautiful” or not.

One fine day, I was chatting with a friend and the conversation was about how a sister had started observing the hijab after being diagnosed with breast cancer. That was the turning point for me. I did not want to observe hijab after being afflicted and compelled to observe it. I did not want to wait till I became a very learned person. I did not want to trivialize hijab as not being part of the basics of Islam.

Although I had still many things to learn and master, I began to research extensively on hijab and came across a lot of information pertaining to it, alhamdulillah. So I called up my original friend and the first thing I uttered was “I am going to do hijab insha’Allah!” Then I went on to share my research with her; not only did she appreciate my stance but she joined me as well! Both of us were more than happy with our decisions, Alhamdulillah!

My transition to hijab, however, was not instant. I did not care about the judgment of people but I had to struggle with the inquisitive looks of my friends and family. Hence, I started with a loose scarf which I did not wrap around my neck. Sometimes, strands of my hair would show. My father asked me to refrain from a scarf while attending wedding ceremonies. I gave in to his obstinacy. I attended just one ceremony without covering, and my dear sisters, I cannot describe to you how ugly and restless I felt! My hands would automatically reach to cover up  –that is how tempting hijab is! It was after that incident I decided not to attend ceremonies at all.

As the days passed, I noticed that most men would stare at my neck, despite my head being covered. I felt robbed of my hijab, my respect, my chastity. That was when I wrapped the scarf around my neck and secured it well with a brooch. That was my first wrap and what a beautiful wrap it was! Masha’Allah. My father did not fancy the whole ‘wrap-thing’ and asked me to take it off. This time, with a stronger eman, I did not give into his wishes. I also decided to attend
ceremonies – with the hijab.

With time, I learnt techniques to perfect my Hijab in terms of modesty so as to not appear clumsy; and though I am still learning, I am happy I do not have to resist this temptation to wear it now, Alhamdulillah!