Reflections

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In this guest post, Sister Amina shares her own experience with hijab, reflecting on what was, what is, and what may be. As they say, courage is not being fearless, but feeling the fear and doing it anyway.

reflectionThis time, last summer, I remember myself being “hijabless” (my addition to the Oxford dictionary).

I remember anytime I saw sisters covering up, I was always drawn to them and really wished I could convince myself to be like them. I remember the feeling of guilt and unrest I always had in my heart knowing that I was disobeying Allah.

I remember the many fears and worries that clouded my mind anytime I convinced myself to take that step – family, friends, strange stares, getting a job and most of all the scorching sun during the summer.

I remember thinking to myself one day: What if I died? What was going to happen to me as a result of my disobedience to Allah?

I remember the amount of courage it took to convince myself to feel the fear and do it anyway.

I remember the feeling of ease and the discharge of burden I felt on the first day I wore the hijab. Alhamdulillah for the strength.

Now, it’s the summer of 2009 and the sun is truly and really scorching. However, this has not caused me to turn back.

Instead, each time I am out, I think to myself: If this weather can be as hot as this, what would it be like on the Day of Reckoning, that Day when there will not be any shade? How much hotter is it going to get? What would it be like in the Hell Fire? How much hotter is it going to be?

I’ll take the heat of this world over the heat the next any day.

May Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala grant us shade on that Day, and save us from the hellfire. Ameen.