Family Fued

Image credit: gaspi *your guide

When I went to Pakistan a couple years ago to visit family, my attire wasn’t exactly a hit. Why wasn’t I taking off my hijab inside the house (when non-Mahrams were present)? Why was I wearing a “gown”? Who did I think I was? If I really wanted to make so-and-so happy, I would take off my hijab and wear this or that.

SubhanAllah. I’ve lived in a non-Muslim country my whole life and visiting a Muslim country, I had innocently assumed people would be more practicing and accepting. Sadly, I was wrong. What’s ironic is I’m more able to practice my deen in a non-Muslim country than this specific Muslim country.

What hurt me the most was when family members would insult my hijab. I would be near tears at times. Alhamdulillah for me though, within a few weeks, I would leave and be home again, away from that environment. Other sisters live there, and have to deal with this on an everyday basis. I was speaking with a close relative of mine and she mentioned if she were to wear hijab, she would be “killed by the talk.” No one supports it because, as my mom put it to me, in their eyes, it’s backwards.

By no means am I saying North America is a hijab-loving place. We have our struggles here as well. But what annoyed me was the fact a nation, which calls itself an “Islamic Republic” would consist of a population of people who are largely against hijab. Alhamdulillah, I saw the random hijabis and niqabis here and there – and they made my heart smile. It is only in retrospect I’ve realized some of those sisters must be the strongest sisters out there – to be able to please their Creator when it may seem like the world is against them. I know I had a hard time there – and I was only there for a few weeks. They live their whole lives in that environment.

I wish now I had stopped one of those sisters on the street and asked “How do you do it?” But I didn’t.

So, I open this up to everyone: when you have family or friends influencing you against what you should be doing, how do you stay strong and persevere? How do you do what your Creator has commanded? Most of all, how do you do this in a way that is wise and beneficial?

May Allah tabaraka wa ta’ala make each one of us of the saabireen (patient) and May He give us the tawfique to properly follow His deen! Ameen.